Bonding

I often reflect "I did this to myself". In some ways it helps to put things back in perspective. I thought it was a good idea to have two small children close together. Easier for me and they will bond better, right?

Eleanor is so young, but has already mastered the art of ornery. She likes to taunt her brother every chance she gets. She'll turn the tv on/off. Over and over again. Tell her no, she'll just look at you, smile sweetly, turn it off, and walk herself into her time out chair.

Alexander whines over everything. And, by everything, I really mean everything! Today, it was because her sister "dared" touch his grapes. "MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMAAAAAAAAAAAA she touched my GWAPES!" And then puts her in time out.

To which Eleanor will sit, pop her but up, and sit again, and pop up, and sit again. And, this frustrates Alexander "MOOOOMMMAAA Un-Ore won't sit in time out!"

He pushes her down, she bites him...they brawl, and I separate them.

Bonding at it's finest!

Negotiations

Regular morning:

Mommy, no go work please

Sorry kiddo, Mommy has to

No, mommy, you stay here. Daddy go work.

Yeah, daddy goes to work, and mommy has to go to work.

No, mommy, daddy goes work, Un-ore goes work, you stay here.

Sorry, kiddo, mommy's gotta go to work.

Hmm...mommy, you stay here with me, okay?

No can do.

Mommy, no go work. You stay here with me, kay? Daddy go work, you see.

How about you watch a train video?

How about you stay here?

How about you eat breakfast?

How about you eat breakfast with me here?

How about you eat breakfast with daddy?

How about daddy go work and Un-ore go work, and you eat breakfast with me, okay?

How about I sneak out the door while you cry leaving us both sad for the moment?

My son is going to be a great lawyer. Yes, I realize that 7:30 AM is too early to want a glass of wine. (((sigh))) Where's my coffee?

The dentist

Apologetically, he shot me up with novacaine (after the courtesy numbing agent). I have a high tolerance for pain. I mean, I was in labor for 15 1/2 hours with an epidural that didn't work before two c-sections. I'm okay with a little novacaine.

And, as I'm sitting there, getting dental work done, it dawns on me that this is a quiet moment. OK, there was some drilling, but you get the point...actual quiet down time for me. No work. No crazy demanding kids hanging off of me. I didn't know what to do (other than sit back gaping like a gold fish as I was getting a filling).

I think I relaxed a little too much, as I was drifting off into sleep.

Sleep, that thing I used to do so well. That thing that I took for granted a little more than two years ago. I snored a bit. I get a jolt awake.

"We're done!"

"Are you sure? You don't want to do anything more? Don't I need a root canal or a bridge or something? Are you sure you don't want to implant a replacement wisdom tooth I had removed long ago?"

"Nope, all done"

(((sigh)))

Hurricane Eleanor

OK, so I've had the house clean. Spotless. Seriously, for me, I was proud.

That is, until Hurricane Eleanor blew threw. In less than 5 minutes (while I was putting laundry away) she managed to mess up the living room completely.

Oddly, I'm proud. She beat her daddy's record!

Seriously?

Why is it whenever you seem to be on the phone, with an important call they decide to demand your attention?

Last night: The kids are happily amused both watching Ni-Hao Kai-lan and by playing Thomas games on the computer.

I sneak away. It's an important call. The kids are amused. I might get away with it. I feel like a zebra, trying to get water from a local watering hole.

Suddenly, like little lions, they realize that mom isn't devoting 100% attention to their every breath. They start to cry, whine, push, bite, shove. Their cries are that of a predator pouncing on their prey.

I end the call, apologetically, to the person on the other end. The little angels resume playing, smug in their conquest. They've eaten the zebra and their bellies are full.

Grandma calls to chit chat. Silence in the other room. The call isn't important enough. Really...really?

Crank monsters

She's up all night nursing and flailing around. We're both tired and cranky.

Suddenly, a familiar children's song plays. She starts to dance, and flashes a smile to me.

All that crankiness melts away.

She's already got me wrapped around her little finger!

Eleanor wins again.

Nap time

After struggling with them to sleep, I achieved the miraculous...they are BOTH napping!

I don't know what to do with myself now.

I'm afraid to move to disrupt the silence.

I contemplate finishing one of the numerous books I've started (hey, I'm an optimist!) Although, I'm sure the quiet flipping of the pages is sure to wake one of them up...